Love Story

In our bedroom, I have a quote that says, “Every Love Story is beautiful, but ours is my favorite.” And what a beautiful story it has been. We have had our ups and downs over the last 17 years, but as we celebrate our anniversary today, my heart is whole as I reflect on our journey. The marriage story began very similarly to how our story has played out over the years: by following the leading of the Lord, one step at a time. 

Almost 18 years ago, Bruce was having his quiet time with the Lord early one Sunday morning. As he sat in God’s presence, the Lord spoke to him, one of the only times Bruce had audibly heard God’s voice. 

“Bruce, I will show you your wife today.”

Bruce was in awe struck. Had he heard this correctly? By this time, he had given up dating for almost a year. He was 36 and had told the Lord he wouldn’t date until God showed him his wife. Was it finally going to happen that morning? 

After arriving at church, Bruce sat up on the balcony. During worship, he couldn’t help but look around, wondering who she was. As soon as worship ended, Bruce was shocked to find his vision had completely blurred. He rubbed his eyes desperately, trying to figure out what was happening. Had he just had a medical emergency? Did he need to get help? 

As he pondered these questions and rubbed his eyes, he saw the sanctuary doors swinging open about 100 feet away. His clarity of vision was only circled on those doors and who had opened them. There walked in a woman with long blond curly hair. The room still was in a haze except for the vision of this woman. She was radiant like an angel. 

As she sauntered into the room, she went over to speak to someone. Once her conversation was complete, she turned back around and walked out the door. Meanwhile, Bruce followed her every movement. Once the doors shut, the Lord spoke again. 

“Bruce, that is your wife.” The second and last time Bruce heard the audible voice of the Lord. 

Instantly, the room returned to normal, and Bruce sat in a complete daze. What had just happened? What was he to do now? As the service dragged on, Bruce continued to process this newfound realization. After church, Bruce quickly headed towards his car and called his brother. 

He shared what had just happened, and his brother had the nerve to say, “Yeah, I know who that is.” 

“How can you know who she is? I don’t even know.” Bruce demanded an answer as he processed his brother’s comment. 

“Christy (his wife) and I have been praying for her for years. I am going to cut wood at the discipleship home she leads behind the church. Why don’t you join me?” 

Bruce was flabergasted. How could this be possible? He had never seen this woman before that morning. But then again, his brother was a social butterfly, and the church had more than 2,000 people attend four different services. 

That next week, Bruce joined his brother. As they stood at the door of the discipleship home, Bruce wondered if he was about to meet his future wife. The doors swung open to the woman’s smiling face that he had seen only days before in a haze of beauty.

She introduced herself as Kara (me) and introduced the two young ladies living with her in the discipleship home. Welcoming them in, I gave them a tour and offered them cookies. Bruce chopped wood with his brother and wondered how the Lord would unfold this one. 

Unbeknownst to Bruce, I exclaimed, after he and his brother left the house, “Wow, Mike’s brother is so hot.”

The following weekend after church service, Bruce saw me and headed in my direction. Catching my eye, I turned towards him with a smile.

“Hello again. Thank you so much for helping us out this last week. We are not good at chopping wood at all.” 

“No problem, I enjoyed doing it. I was wondering if you and the girls living with you would like me to cook you all dinner sometime.” 

My smile diminished into a panicked gaze. Yes, I had thought he was cute, but was I ready for a ‘date’? In desperation, I began asking him a series of questions. Our kid’s pastors saw the concern written all over my face. He approached. 

“Hello, who’s your friend Kara?” 

I introduced the two of them. Glancing over at our kid’s pastor, I mouthed “Thank you” as I slowly backed out of the conversation. 

Once in our church lobby, I bolted to my mentor. She was chatting with our small group pastor when she saw me dashing towards her. “What’s the matter, honey? You look in shock.” They both turned their attention to me as I stammered, “He asked to make dinner for me. . . “  

“You mean a guy asked you out?” She and the pastor tried to hold back a smile but miserably failed. 

However, my emotions were still out of control. Panic and fear rose within me like I hadn’t experienced in years. Was I ready? Would I ever be ready? 

Over the next several weeks, I wrestled with my emotions, realizing God was still healing my broken heart. In the last three and a half years, I had seen so many breakthroughs in my personal walk, but to trust someone again. That was an area of my heart that I still had not opened since that horrific day.   

Bruce started to meet with our men’s pastor every week. Since I worked at the church, I began to see him in passing regularly, and I could tell he wanted to connect on a deeper level than I was ready to do. Therefore, I sent him a letter. I thanked him for his interest and told him God had the perfect woman for him, but it wasn’t me. 

Not long after receiving the denial letter, the Lord told Bruce he was to buy me an engagement ring. “Lord, are you crazy? She wants nothing to do with me. Why would I buy her a ring?” Yet the Lord had spoken to his heart, and Bruce knew he was to obey. 

While I, on the other hand, began having deeper conversations with the Lord. Would I ever be ready to date again or to even get married again? My heart had been shattered into a million pieces and had been stomped on over and over again. Now, my ex-husband was remarried, and I had finally been released after 3.5 years of standing for the man who would have emotionally crushed me if the Lord hadn’t stepped in. 

As I shared my concerns with the Lord, I felt Him nudge me to trust Him with this part of my heart. I began to ask the Lord if He thought I was ready to date again. If He did, then He’d have to direct every path. My first request was for a man who loved Jesus with his whole heart and worshipped the Lord with his whole heart.

A couple of days later, I was talking to our worship leader, and she stated that Bruce was a passionate worshiper. She had been in a class at church where he was, and she had seen him crying out to the Lord unashamed as she led worship. “That’s cool.” I nonchalantly stated, but inside, fear rose.

A week later, I told the Lord I desperately wanted a husband who felt led to go into missions full-time because I knew I was. The following weekend, we had a pastor who had been a missionary in Papua New Guinea preach. At the end of his sermon, he asked people to stand if the Lord was calling them into full-time missions. That day, I was sitting on the balcony and was looking over the congregation as I stood. To my surprise, Bruce was standing. 

You’d think I’d start to get the hint that the Lord was answering my prayers. However, I was still not convinced. I again asked the Lord for a man with a heart for at-risk children. Soon, I found out Bruce had been a “Big Brother” to a fatherless little boy for the last three years and that he was heading to camp to be a counselor with children who were in foster care. Again, you’d think I’d get the hint. But my fear ran deep. 

A few weeks later, I was about to take a team out to minister to the homeless. Before I went, I asked a friend to pray for me. As she prayed, she began to weep. She saw this vision of me holding hands with my husband in this large field, and children surrounded us. Smiling, I thanked her and gathered items for the homeless. Thoughts swirled in my mind; I was going to get married again and have children; how exciting. 

Later that afternoon, I returned to the church excited about everything God had allowed me to be a part of that day. As I was wrapping things up at the church, our community pastor saw me and wanted me to know that Bruce really liked kids. By this point, I was completely annoyed with how much all our church staff were trying to play matchmaker. So, I was a little rude and left for the day. That evening, the Lord convicted me and told me I needed to apologize. 

The next time I saw the community pastor, I apologized and shared my friend’s vision. The pastor looked at me and stated. “Normally, I would not share this information because it’s my wife’s information to share. However, after your friend’s vision, I must tell you that Bruce is in the Ministry Training Institute, where my wife is teaching. The other day, the group practiced hearing God’s voice and getting words for people. Bruce had been put in the hot seat, and everyone was getting words for him. One specific word was that he too was in a huge field holding hands with his wife and children surrounded them.”

My jaw dropped. How could that be? Only days apart, we had the same vision spoken over us by two different people. Goosebumps went up my arms. I could no longer deny that God’s hand was all over this, and I would be stupid not to pursue this relationship. Therefore, I looked on our church database and got his number. I would call him when I got off work. 

That same morning, Bruce was prompted by the Holy Spirit to call me at church. He had never called or pursued me since I had rejected him. And yet, that morning, God encouraged him to contact me. 

That phone call was just the beginning of a whirlwind dating experience. We went on our first date at the end of April 2007, and in August 2007, Bruce proposed to me right before we jumped out of a perfectly good airplane. He asked, “Just like we are about to take a leap of faith out of this airplane, would you take the ultimate leap of faith and marry me?”  

I said yes, and 2.5 months later, we had our first kiss on our wedding day at Ventura Beach. 

It has been an adventurous 17 years. We have had six babies together and have lived in 14 homes, two countries, and four states. We have also been on outreach in 12 different countries. Marriage has had its ups and downs, but we have always followed the Lord together. And as we have pursued our first love, our marriage has gotten stronger daily. Bruce has become my best friend, lover, and our children’s father. 

I love you, babe, happy anniversary! Thank you for always being willing to follow Jesus at any cost and walking with me through this hectic, fun-filled life! I am blessed. 

Prayer Requests

• Healing from the tumor in Esperanza’s head and Bruce’s sub-tailor joint and bone spurs.

• Monthly partners: we are feeling the effects of inflation and are looking for more monthly partners (click here to partner).